being sick at 16 bryant...

being sick at 16 bryant kinda sucks. i'm not gonna lie. sure theres roxie pup to entertain. and the computer, and digital cable. but mostly i've just been moping around, slowly going blind from staring at the computer screen all day.

today was different. i went to watch a class at my new job, and sniffled and coughed the entire time. little kids tried climbing all over me and i screamed, "no! i'm sick!" my new boss heckled me for coming in sick and i drove home miserable. roxie annoyed me like always, constantly bringing me her toys and climbing all over the computer chair. i'm a bored mother when i don't feel good, pale in comparison to the bumpasses and my house full of screaming people. i took her out for a walk and came back. before i was even able to take her leash off the doorbell rang. there was a big black car in the driveway and i was scared. i said "who is it?" on the intercom and there was no answer, just another ring. i took roxie with me to answer the door, AND THERE WAS BRIAN BELL WITH A BOWL OF SOUP AND MANGO TEA!! (girls, this ones golden!) boy was i excited. so now i'm enjoying a hearty bowl of minestrone, rice with broccoli and mango tea. and my spirits are lifted.

being sick at 16 bryant can be good!

-Laura

p.s.-

pete just called a going out outfit, a goinoutfit.

pure genius.

AND HE JUST TOLD ME HE GOT GROPED BY A MAN IN A CLUB!

pete's arrival

well pete came home from florida today, all burned up and red as a plum. bearing gifts such as "seld-adhesive stylish mustaches" one for each day of the week! so we took him to the diner so he could dish about his vacation filled with whores and red necks. whilst dining, we heard loud thuds coming from a booth in the corner, where there were a few latinas and a tiny latinito! (baby latino boy). across the room was a booth full of seemingly harmless old lady's (looks are deceiving). turns out the baby was the one beating on the table, and screaming, while the old lady's lurk from the opposite corner.
right then we heard: "excuse me, is someone banging on the table or something?" from the oldster table. no response. a few seconds later: "can you make him stop? if he can't behave he should be told!" (or something retarded like that) just then one of the latinas shouted, "i don't complain when you can't drive! go break a hip or somethin!" a few seconds later the lovely old women get up and walk out (or so we thought) and the latina screams "hope you break your leg!" the whole while we were laughing hysterically and enjoying the antics. after mocking the entire spectacle for a good 30 minutes, we walked to the register to pay for our meal and who but the old ladies are sitting in a booth next to the window! THEY ACTUALLY MOVED TO GET AWAY FROM THE BABY!! moral of the story: old ladies are afraid of babies. and pete is home. aah, the joys of jersey city.

-Laura

....... and sometimes the worst things must come to an end.

Well lovie-dovies. Seems like another adventure has come to an end and soon enough I will be within the hot, sweaty, drab, insane, wife-beating, heart-braking, sista-fisting, child abusing, bong-hitting, high pace, tense, insane and dare I say loving walls that surround this little oasis I like to refer to as 16 Bryant ave (apt 2,,,, I think). This is the 6th day i woke up away from this little dream house and I am in serious need of all that makes her the 16 B-A we all need. I will have stories about my adventure, but this blog is about nothin else, other then 16 Bryant so it is out of line for me to post about anything other then that. So here, at 9AM, I sit in a room filled with bottles, young people, sunburn and sweat (yey Florida) dreaming of my beautiful 16 Bryant ave. With that, I will be doing all I can to be upon your poorly finished hardwood flooring soon enough.

with that I leave you with the best thing a Dr. has ever told me.

THIS IS GOING TO BE A BIT UNCOMFORTABLE, YOU MIGHT WANT TO GRAB ONTO THE SIDE OF THE BED AND SQUEEZE

with love, lust and total lack of relaxation

-Pete (iron man)

saturday night! yea yea!!

so we had 7 bottles of wine to finish and the night was still young! kirsten somehow found a "tune your ukelele" section on the menu of "the jerk" dvd. chris dracula came over with some friends and we went crazy. pete dressed up like iron man, roxie nibbled on hands, luke was his normal vulgar, hilarious, non-drinking self. we called robbie a. (kiki's dad) and sang him a happy birthday ukulele song. i drank an entire bottle of white wine!!! (and ended up crying for stupid reasons). and matt had a gorgeous lady over.

saturday was cooler than friday.

kirsten went to her grandmother's 80th birthday party, and luke and i went on a true adventure! first downtown to wonder bagel and staples. luke decided he wasn't ready to go back home. for some reason we started talking about dave and dani, and he got really excited about getting them a life size rubber fist from a porn shop! then it was off to "romantic depot" in hoboken. as soon as we got into hoboken i almost ran over a squad of ugly beats wearing matching outfits. we pulled onto washington street as we were laughing about how much we hate hoboken yuppies, and low and behold, we drove right into THE SAINT PATTY'S DAY PARADE!! two things i HATE the most in this world, guidos and irish memorabilia!!! luckily we found a parking spot right outside the r.d. where we got heckled by guidos while walking in and everything was way over priced. on the way back home, for reasons i don't recall, we ended up at at target. which is right next to staples where this whole whirlwind started. in target i witnessed a few dirt bags threatening their children with beatings. somehow we ended up back home that night. kirsten arrived with a CASE of wine from the party and learned how to play happy birfday on the uke while she was there! you can just imagine how the rest of the night went.
we teased our hair!(i don't remember why)

leap year day, "the day that didnt exist" (according to kirsten)

ah, where do i start? this weekend was a rather eventful one at 16 bryant. on friday kirsten came over early so we could go to american apparel in hoboken. (and meet a black friend and do a few more things) after a.a. we sat in starbucks for a good hour watching stupid yuppies on the street (we also spotted IAN and his beard!) we probably saw 3 black people total while we were sitting there, and none of them wanted to be our friends. so when we realized our parking meter time was up, we walked back to my car, only to discover the battery was dead and it wouldn't start. as some of you know, both kirsten and i have slight anxiety problems when it comes to talking to new people. so after a few sorry attempts at asking for help, and a lot of phone calls to friends who were at work, we decided it would be best for me to stand in the street, jumper cables in hand, and hope for a good samaritan to stop and offer us help. this actually worked. a minivan carrying a stout chubby man of latino decent pulled over! the man rolled down his window and yelled "you need a jump? lemme see you jump." and i giggled and jumped like the stupid ass i am. fast forward, he jumped my car. it took us an hr to get home (about 5 miles) and we harassed minha on the phone the entire time. when we got home, we had a delectable meal of grilled cheese and red wine (pete, get jealous.) luke came home, pete came home. we drank a lot (red bull/ vodka, my new favorite drink), defiled kiki's barbie coloring book, ben and eric came over. me and kirsten can'r really remember what else happened. technically it doesn't matter cause leap year day is a fake day anyway.

Little ditty 'bout 16 bryant

Dear 16 Bryant blog. Kirsten just stopped hick-uping. YEY, life has gotten better and i still feel bad about killing her with a pillow 3 times. it wasn't so bad- says kirsten... drinking water upside down doesnt do shit let me tell you. all it does it is get water up your nose. being smothered with a pillow might help, but really they just got away when they want to, being smothered though, might just be the funniestpart of the hiccups. HICCUPS themselves are NOT a laughing matter. They are deadly and dangerous and can seriously mess some sick convos and gnarly movies.I agree completely, says pete, truely a sad and upsetting condition. I never felt quite as sad as I did watching this completely capable person be grounded and studded by the improper functioning of the most important muscle in her body,,, of corse I mean her breathing diafragm. Yes I admit I tried stunting her breath via pillow. This is known as smothering the issue, and I am not proud of this attempt in the least. I was scared of the horrible outcome that was the obvious possibility of the patient not waking from her hickup ridden situation (aka, she could die). we also found out that hitting your upper abdominals wiht a bowling ball repedly will also not help this issue. Gladly the problem was remedied. Now we can go back to the simple and obvious problems that plague anyone in their early mid twenties on a chilly and alcho-riden saturday night.

this is what happens in 16 Bryant ave.


-Pete / Kirsten